I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
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