dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Pooping to opera.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
