my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
So here I am, sexting at work.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
