i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
