I heard we made out
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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