I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
