I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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