He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
