he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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