i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
