Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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