we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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