Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
my liver is dry heaving
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
