If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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