We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
