O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
