Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
