i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Randomize
