And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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