in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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