Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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