Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
