dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
do nipples grow back?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize