I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
what day is it and did you see me today?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
