are you still at the devil's house?
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
