u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Randomize
