WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
