Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
