So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
