im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
