I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Your penis caused this!
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
