i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize