can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
