so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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