Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize