what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
