i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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