Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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