How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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