But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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