I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize