So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize
