Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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