what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize