lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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