I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
