What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Randomize
