Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
