Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
