buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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