me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
