areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize